Stupid is as stupid does! And we sure does stupid!

Early returns indicate the South is embracing all the idiots this election, from Ayn Rand Paul in Kentucky to Marco Rubio in Florida.  Like Tugg Speedman from Tropic Thunder, they’ll soon learn to regret not having the sage advice of Kirk Lazarus to guide their voting:

You went full retard, man. Never go full retard.

Aaaaacck!

What a complete fucking moron.  You’d think if  you were heading into the debate that would make or break your election chances, and you were planning to mouth off about the Constitution, you’d at least try reading the damn thing, right?  Or at least the First Amendment?

Unluckily for her, she’s not running in a dumbshit state(1,2,3) like Arizona, where her ignorance would undoubtedly have vaulted her ahead of Harry Reid.

(1) Arizonans think bringing guns in bars is a good idea

(2) Arizonans keep voting for McCain

(3) Arizonans having a good time

What the Spineless Dems should do is take this up now before the election, then get priceless footage of Repug candidates filibustering tax cuts.  That might not save Dem bacon, but such footage would be the gift that keeps on giving for the attack ads of tomorrow!

*Update*  Or are they spineless?  Median Senator net worth is $1.7M, Representative $645K, with over 44% of  Congress worth $1M+, and 50 members worth over $10M.  Quite likely they want to extend their own tax cuts.

*Update 3:41PM* Great post by Juan Cole on Dems keeping the Senate this year.  Mostly I love his quote:

“Since there are only two parties in the US, and one has gone bonkers, every election is now a game of Russian roulette for the American republic. But this time, at least, the chamber that has come up looks to be empty.”

“Will you tell those dumbasses at the Tea Party to stop asking questions about birth certificates while I’m on the camera,” Buck said to the staffer. “God, what am I supposed to do?”

Now if he’d only speak the truth when he knows he is on camera, America can make some progress going forward!

Tip of the ‘Nose to Film Critic Buddy

They're coming to get you, Rand!

There he goes again, shooting his mouth off!  “Ayn” Rand Paul vows to stop illegal immigration by building a vast underground electric fence on our southern border.  Underground?  Who is he planning to stop, the Mole People?

Or as the Mole People themselves put in (courtesy of the Residents in Mark of the Mole):

“We have left our lives, we have left our land,
We have left behind all we understand,
Now we must cry out, yes we must demand –
Let my children live in a land that’s low,
Where the holes are deeper than light can go;
Let them have not pride but instead a soul
That can see the shame of the hands that glow.!”

Louisiana Republican

The gushing goo destroying the livelihoods of the folks who live on Louisiana’s coast hasn’t damped the ardor of Louisiana Repug leaders to drill, baby drill.  You know, I feel bad for the poor Louisianans, but riddle me this – why do they continue to vote for abusive politicians?  Let Jindal go clean up the fucking mess his philosophy has created.

*Update 9:50P PT* Forrest Gump in 2010: bad news, BP oil spill destroyed his livelihood, his entire shrimping fleet had to be shut down.  Good news – he bought Apple stock, and held on to it!  Only question is, will he vote for David “double down on offshore drilling & liability cap” Vitter again this year, or will he realize that his shrimping business would be better off with a vote for Melancon?  Remember, stupid is as stupid does…

Seriously, I think we progressives should flood this ‘movement’ as faux reactionaries and push hard to create an extremist platform with wingnut candidates.  At this point that is the only thing which can save the Democratic Party’s ass in the upcoming Congressional elections.

*Update 12/14/09* Senator Tom Harkin grows a spine – will he be expelled from the Whimps?