Caption contest, 7/30

(John McCain in Maine last week, via Reuters.)

Stumble it!  

Tags: ,

Google Ads


Blogads

Categories

Archives

Twitter – Greenboy

Twitter – Swopa

15 Responses to “Caption contest, 7/30”

  1. Kilgore Trout Says:

    ( song to the tune of Bobby Brown by Frank Zappa)

    Hey, there, people I’m John McCain
    They say I’ve never been insane
    My car is fast, my teeth is shiney
    I tell all the my voters they can kiss my heinie

    Here I am at a famous school
    Im dressin sharp n im
    Actin cool
    I got a country here wants help with their paper
    Let ‘em do all the work n maybe later Ill rape her

    Oh God I am the american dream
    I do not think Im too extreme
    An Im a handsome sonofabitch
    Get a political job n be real rich

    (get a good
    Get a good
    Get a good
    Get a good job)

    Fake constitutional democracy
    Came creepin across the nation
    I tell you people it was more than an orgy
    When I fucked this politician by the name of Georgie
    He made a little speech then,
    Aw, he tried to make me say when
    He had my past in a vice, but he left my grades
    I guess there still in the records, but my memory fades

    Oh God I am the american dream
    But now I smell like vaseline
    An Im a miserable sonofabitch
    Am I a senator or criminal..i dont know which

    (I wonder wonder
    Wonder wonder)

    So I went out n bought me a leisure suit
    I jingle my change, but Im still kinda cute
    Got a job doin Republican shows
    Basically, all my friends that’s how it goes

    Eventually me n a friend
    Sorta drifted along into s&m
    I can take about an hour on with Bush in the shower
    But I’ve discovered it pushes my rating lower.

    Oh God I am the american dream
    With a spindle up my butt till it makes me scream
    An Ill do anything to ahead forge
    I lay awake nights sayin, thank you, George!

    Oh god, oh god, Im so fantastic!
    Thanks to Georgie , Im a politcal spastic
    And my name is John McCain
    Watch me now, Im not insane,
    And my name is John McCain
    Watch me now, Im not insane.

  2. Ravi J Says:

    He is saying ‘i am demented.’

  3. grascarp Says:

    “..my friends, if there’s one thing I have learned in the Congress… it’s that destroying five aircraft during my flying days was the perfect introduction to a career in Republican politics.”

  4. Mr. Obvious Says:

    How do I know this? Kidneys man, kidneys.

  5. Mike Sheehan Says:

    “Guns aren’t dangerous, minds are dangerous. You want a weapon? It’s right here, my friends.”

  6. Athenawise Says:

    “My friends, I am wearing a baseball cap.”

  7. frankdawg81 Says:

    With apologies to Mr. E.Y. Harburg:

    I would not be just a nuffin’
    My head all full of stuffin’
    My heart all full of pain.
    I would dance and be merry
    Life would be a ding-a-derry
    If I only had a brain

  8. rota Says:

    “I have that ‘vision thing,’ too, and it’s right here.”

  9. RepubAnon Says:

    McCain’s failed attempt to pick his nose shows marked deterioration of motor skills and coordination.

  10. james k. sayre Says:

    Damn, my friends, couldn’t find that eye-lash curler this morning and I know that I just look like crap. Hee, hee… Don’t you guys hate it when your wifey steals your eye-lash curlers? Well, bomb, bomb, bomb Eye-ran, ha-ha…

  11. Russ Says:

    “Since my wristwatch flipped around, I tell time with my finger. It’s one o’clock.”

  12. pt bridgeport Says:

    “… because I love to count. One! Ah-hah-haah. One Maine McCain supporter at my rally.”

  13. Susan Says:

    “if I only had a brain….”

  14. Klaus Says:

    My secret plan to capture bin Laden is in my brain, and I’m not gonna tell. It’s key to winning this election, do you think I’d just give it away for nothing?

  15. Beef Says:

    Straight shooter McCain, with his habitual finger to the air, tests the wind before selecting the appropriate aroma of illustrious GOP bullshit to spew.